| In dreams, the mind and the body seek re-balancing. The tensions and distortions of life are re-processed into new patterns. I believe equilibrium is the continual, elusive target of all being. “Order” appears in graduated phases, interspersed with chaos and disintegration. By 2005, I was feeling very deep, surging emotions in response to our nation’s attack and occupation of the sovereign nation of Iraq. I could not paint without feeling these urgent emotions pressing at the door for expression. About 35 years earlier I had been a medical corpsman with Marines in Vietnam. A period of about ten years in the 60’s and early 70’s was for me an immersion in mass trauma, seemingly endless warfare, wrenching personal conflicts in work and relationships. That era gradually receded as my life moved in other directions, but the imprint of the former was profound and lasting. So many events of recent years seem to be trying to reinforce the inhumane distortions of before. Our Iraq mistake is Vietnam all over again, and will have even more disastrous results, unless we intervene with creative alternatives. For me, making art is a start. I began to search for an “image” that would portray the inner turmoil, the cellular regurgitation, of the extreme pressures of combat and recovery. There was no “representational” way to portray this, so I simply began to play with line and color, to keep it mobile and responding to the edge of feelings that sought an outlet through this means. These pieces are totally improvisational, and grow without a plan. What resulted were about 25 paintings on 24” x 24” boards. Keeping the square seemed like a good way to pressure the image through regular walls. As the images progressed over a 4-month period, the feelings began to flow with more force, and seemed to snag and drag up peripheral emotional energies with them. Sometimes I would feel like I was processing someone else’s suppressed emotions or memories along with mine, or even a wide band of common energies for which I had simply found a vent. This phase of work closed down when it exhausted my material resources to continue. However, by no means did the energies subside. I continue to paint “abstract”, along with other types of imagery, but it seems the newer pictures are less compressed, are more fluid, and have extended their emotional reach and complexity beyond the initial images. |
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